Get Together for Yes Gorey, 18 May 2018

Good evening everyone!

My name is Fionán Donohoe. I am a Gorey man – born and raised – and I’d like to thank the organisers of tonights event for the opportunity to address you all on this very important topic.

I am here representing a group called Doctors for Choice. This is a large group of doctors from all over the country who are advocating a Yes vote in the forthcoming referendum on behalf of ourselves and our patients.

I am a doctor in the field of Obstetrics & Gynaecology, this means I spend between 50 and 80 hours each week looking after women who are pregnant, in labour, have recently had a baby or are faced with issues like miscarriage or ectopic pregnancy. I deliver babies, I perform caesarean sections, I deal with emergencies for mothers and for babies. It is an extremely rewarding, sometimes stressful and oftentimes strange job – there is tonnes of good news and happy times with the safe arrival of new lives and also times of unimaginable sadness and crisis. It is all these experiences that have informed my decision to advocate for a Yes vote in favour of repealing the 8^th Amendment.

As we know, the current situation means that an abortion is only permissible if there is a real and substantial threat to the mother’s life from physical disease or suicide. This arrangement fails to provide compassionate care to women in our country on multiple levels. I know because I have met these women.

We have heard so many times throughout this campaign from brave families who have shared their stories of pregnancies affected by fatal fetal abnormalities/life limiting conditions. These are conditions which mean the baby may die in the womb, during labour or shortly after birth. These are stories which they should never have had to share. I challenge anyone to listen to the stories of these women and not see how the 8^th amendment needs to be repealed. Removing the 8^th amendment will not make termination in these cases mandatory but it will allow those families who wish to end their or their baby’s suffering, access care in their own country surrounded by their own support network without incurring financial, logistical costs around burial or funeral of their longed for infant in addition to the emotional toll this must take. We have heard from one of these everyday heroes already this evening.

Another cohort of Irish women that the 8^th amendment fails is those who find themselves pregnant after rape or incest. The vast majority of people support access to abortion for these women. If we are to be able to legislate for abortion for these women then the 8^th amendment must be repealed. However, difficulties arise around ‘proving’ that sexual assault took place. Dr. Maeve Eogan, Clinical Director of the Sexual Assault Treatment Unit at the Rotunda Hospital in Dublin and director of SATU services nationally has told us that no single physical finding when you examine someone after sexual assault proves rape. And as we have seen in recent media reporting, proving that rape happened or didn’t happen requires a long arduous confrontational process through the courts. On a humane level, should someone who is a victim of these most terrible crimes be required by law to relate the details of this heinous crime to a complete stranger in order to ‘deserve’ a termination? That is not compassion, that is compounding the trauma of the assault.

The proposed legislation to replace the 8^th amendment includes the open access to abortion up until 12 weeks to give these women time to consider their options and access safe care should they CHOOSE abortion because once again this will not make abortion in these cases mandatory.

The 8^th amendment also has a massive negative impact on women with complex medical conditions for whom pregnancy may pose a threat to their health. Cystic fibrosis is an example of one such condition which effects women of childbearing age and depending on the severity of the disease, pregnancy may pose a risk to that woman’s life and her health. Indeed, I have looked after patients who have not made it through the pregnancy because of complications of their condition which were worsened by the pregnancy. They and their baby have died. Some of these patients desperately wanted to be pregnant and we do everything in our power to support them and keep them well throughout the pregnancy but those who have not wanted to be pregnant have no choice but to continue the pregnancy and run the risk of deterioration in their health unless they have the means to travel.

The current legislation means that the risk to this woman’s life must be ‘real and substantial’. Doctors must decide how sick is sick enough to permit termination of the pregnancy. This is a grey area and completely ignores the fact that pregnancy may negatively effect the woman’s overall health in the longer term also. That is to say that the pregnancy may not kill the woman, but it may seriously disimprove her health so as to leave her in worse condition afterwards and into the longer term while trying to care for a newborn. As a society and as doctors, we are encouraged to promote healthy behaviours for people, take exercise, lose weight, stop smoking. For women with complex medical conditions, avoiding pregnancy and having access to termination may be even more important than some of these measures.

Doctors are trained to be proactive and the saying that prevention is the best cure most definitely applies in medicine. The 8^th Amendment means that we must wait until the woman is at ‘real and substantial’ risk of dying before we can intervene to end the pregnancy. In no other field of modern medicine is this acceptable. Since the death of Savita Halapannavar, patients have asked us fearfully if the same thing that happened to Savita is happening to them, they have asked how high does my temperature have to be before you can act? Can you imagine being in that position at a vulnerable time when your much longed for pregnancy has become much more complicated than you ever wanted it to be, to have to wait til you yourself were at risk of dying? The right to life of the baby inside you who’s chances of survival are extremely remote trumps your own right to life. It is mind boggling.

This open access to abortion up until 12 weeks gestation I think is a stumbling block for a lot of people. They support access to abortion for fatal fetal abnormalities and in cases of rape and incest but find it difficult to accept the unrestricted access aspect of the proposed legislation. To anyone listening to this who feels this way I ask them to ask themselves how many weeks would you feel comfortable with? Most people will only realise they’re pregnant by 5 or 6 weeks and if the cut off is any earlier this may force them to make a rushed decision which may not be right for them if given more time to consider. The first 12 weeks of pregnancy are collectively called the first trimester and abortion performed during this time is associated with fewer complications and is safer. As I have mentioned already, the 12 weeks gives victims of sexual violence a reasonable window of opportunity to decide what they wish to do.

I graduated medical school full of optimism. I was going to be the best doctor in the world. All my patients were going to follow my advice and treatment plans and get better and it was all going to be wonderful. Quickly I realised that life is not that simple. People will always do things that we would rather they didn’t. They do things that you know you would never do if you were in that position. Women who are addicted to heroin become pregnant and we deal with the complications for pregnancy for mother and baby that comes with this, we help and support them through the pregnancy. Women smoke during pregnancy and we deal with that, we try to help them to quit and if they don’t we deal with the fall out that can have on the pregnancy. I may not agree with these women’s choices but I don’t refuse to look after them because I don’t agree with them. Women already access termination of pregnancy in Ireland, whether that be by travelling to other countries if they can afford it or by ordering medications online and taking them unsupervised. Whether we like it or not abortion already exists in Ireland. On May 25^th we have an opportunity to face up to that fact and provide compassion and care for women when they need it the most.

9 Days, 3 Letters - Y.E.S.

Take heart friends, only 9 days to go until May 22nd. Only 9 days left to secure a YES vote, only 9 more days of endless media coverage, only 9 more days of the stench of red herrings, only 9 more days of having our lives dissected and discussed by every member of the country.

I’m not even in the country at the moment and #MarRef is at the forefront of my mind most of the time. The debates are unpleasant to watch (not solely because of the RTE player) and yet I can’t bring myself to switch them off. The arguments are wounding. It is incredibly difficult to listen to someone speak so openly against you and your life. I do not know how the likes of Una Mullally, Colm O’Gorman and myriad other advocates for YES remain so composed in the face of such horror. They are far greater people than I.

I would love nothing more than to go bury my head in the sand for the next 9 days and hope everything goes the right way.

But as a great man once said (and continues to say on an almost daily basis), hope is NOT a strategy. We must be resilient. The final lap is the hardest to run but that is when you win the race and by God I want to win this race.

So turn off the debates, stop compulsively twitter searching #MarRef, stop reading the polls and the articles (after you’ve finished this one), stop trying to take on those staunch no people on Facebook, stop listening to radio debates on surrogacy and adoption. Focus on what you can do. Get involved. Target the people Iona et al are hoping their confusion tactics will work on and speak with them rationally, reassure them, speak with compassion, show them how much this means to you and yours. GO CANVASSING. No one wants to, it is daunting at first but you will meet the most glorious people you can imagine, many of them very attractive and very single and all of them fearless and fierce and fun. The politicians don’t do it for the craic - it works!

Be tough, steel yourself against the negativity, find shelter in friends and loved ones, vent in private. Do not let them under your skin, they do not deserve to be there.

Most of all, do as Sebastian Barry suggests and ‘honour the majesty, radiance and promise’ of our human souls by voting YES. Don’t wake up on May 23rd with regrets. Do everything in your power to ensure this passes.

Please.

Mobilise your Mother

“Don’t mind them - they’re just jealous!”

A token phrase that I heard from my very Irish Mammy at several points throughout my youth, usually in response to some inconsequential slight or minor taunt on the school playground.

I have grown up a lot since then and while I may not need to hear this phrase or be reminded that I should wear a coat when it’s cold outside, my mother continues to pretend that no time has passed. To her I will always be the child in need of protection, encouragement and reminders to wear gloves in the winter. Therein, lies an entire well of untapped resources - The Power of our Mammies.

I was born on June 22nd 1988 which, if you ask my mother, was actually the longest day of that year. The moment I entered this world she had plans for me. She wanted me to be happy and healthy. She wanted me to grow up, to get a good job, to be successful, to get married, to have a family of my own. Nowhere in her plan did me being gay feature. My coming out, while not a complete shock to her, did of course represent a challenge. Not because I was now living a life of sin or because who I am was against the teachings of the Church but because being gay was never in her plan for me. She thought I would now lead a lonely life, never get married or have a family. Suddenly, her hopes and dreams for me seemed less achievable.

She paused for a moment, she gathered her thoughts and she got on with things - in true Irish Mammy style. She educated herself, she realised that all those dreams she had for me were still achievable, just in a different way. She started to enquire as to whether i’d met ‘anyone I liked better than myself.’ And when I did (eventually) find that someone, she welcomed him into her home as she would one of her own children, whispering in my ear, ‘God, he’s very handsome!’ when his back was turned. She tells all our relatives how he’s a ‘lovely chap’ and ‘it’s like he’s been coming here for years.’ I’m starting to wonder does she like him more than she likes me.

10 years ago, my mother would probably have been indifferent to this forthcoming referendum. She may have even been against it. In that time her viewpoint has changed because of the love she has for me.

She will be voting yes and she will be encouraging everyone she knows to vote yes too. For her only son, his friends, his community and his relationships. All of which are worthy of the same constitutional protections as those of her two heterosexual daughters.

And everyone will listen, for there is great power to be found in what mothers say about their children.

And so, I say to everyone mobilise your mammy, ask her to talk to her friends and work colleagues about this. She can change their minds in a way that we can’t.

To my own mother, I say thank you for everything. I am so lucky to have you.

19.3.15

Memorandum on Marriage

FAO Heterosexuals of Ireland.

RE: Marriage Equality.

It is argued that emotion has no place in debate but it is impossible for me to take emotion out of this equation. This topic is too personal to me. I'm sitting here trying to write something that accurately and succinctly conveys how important this to me and I cannot find the words.

Those of you reading this who know me personally, will probably find that hard to believe.

My story is no different to countless others that you will hear in the coming months. My reasons for asking you to support the campaign are no doubt the same ones as everybody else. But they are still important and I will still share them with you:

My love is the same. It is worthy of the same protections as that between a man and a woman. Our relationships are equal.

Marriage equality will send a message that will transcend society. It will send a message to our at-risk gay young people not that it will get better but that it already is better, that it is okay to love who you love because that love holds a place in society.

We homosexuals are real people. We are not stereotypical half-people off the television. We are your teachers, your nurses, your doctors, your politicians, your hairdressers, your bin men. We have lives which are probably not that dissimilar from yours, with the same insecurities and the same concerns. We have crap days at work, we should probably eat better, we’re trying to go to mass more and there’s often too much month at the end of the money. My point is: we are human. We are just like you.

So when confronted with that ballot paper on May 22nd I ask you to consider the above. It means an awful lot to us and won’t affect you very much at all. That state sponsored pencil you’re holding in that strange wooden contraption in your local national school wields an awful lot of power.

Use it wisely.

Vote yes.

24.2.15

Being an Agent of Change

I love the phrase ‘Agent of Change’. I can’t decide if it is because of the James Bond images it conjures up or because it’s something I actually give a shit about. Probably both. Change is, as we are all told, inevitable and I think a very positive thing. Like all things worth having it is not easily realised and frequently resisted.

Change requires Radicals (with a capital R) - people who are not afraid to rock the boat but possess the wherewithal to not fall out of it. These people are ardent, confident and forthright. They are leaders in the truest sense.

Alternatively, they are seen as ‘pushy’ or one of those ‘causes people’. We are quick to judge them and undermine the good they are trying to do. Their efforts are met with eye rolls and oh-here-she-goes-again smirks and that is a crying shame.

 They, of course, couldn't care less. They’re not doing it for the approval or the status, they just care enough to do something.

 I want to be one of those people. I am trying to be one of those people. I give a shit.

I've decided that complaining is no longer an option. No more: ‘Oh isn't it terrible that I can’t get married? Oh poor me.’ In it’s stead: WHAT AM I GOING TO DO ABOUT THAT? Less complaining, more action. And these actions do not need to be grand UN speeches a la Emma Watson, they just need to be something, anything at all that can further the cause of the things I care about.

So, in the coming months I'm going to try write some stuff about various things I care about. Some of it will be serious, some light hearted, marriage equality will most probably feature heavily.

So give up your eye-rolls for Lent and leave your oh-here-he-goes-again smirks at home and join me in The Land of Giving a Shit About Things. Population: YOU.

05.02.2015

Letter to The Editor - Irish Times

A letter I wrote to The Irish Times:

Sir, – It was a brave move of Leo Varadkar to speak publicly about his sexual orientation. Victory in the forthcoming referendum can only be secured if each and every member of the gay community becomes a self-elected public representative for the cause of marriage equality. It is time to come out and speak up! Talk to your parents, your siblings, your grandparents, your nieces and nephews, your cousins, your friends and your work colleagues. Tell them why they should vote yes; respond to their concerns with reason, evidence and respect. These are the people who can realise Mr Varadkar’s hope “to be an equal citizen in his own country”. –

Yours, etc,
Dr FIONÁN DONOHOE,
Glasnevin,
Dublin 9.

20.01.15

Obstetricians Anonymous

I am an obstetrician and I am not sorry for that.

People react strangely whenever I tell them that. I’ve had people ask me if I’m a lesbian (seriously) or if I’m a pervert. Some think it must be the best job in the world and more don’t even know what it means.

I tell them all the same thing - once I’ve clarified my position as neither lesbian nor pervert - that it is a fantastic job, that it is undoubtedly a huge privilege to deliver babies, to be present for that life altering moment in people’s lives. And of course, that it is bloody hard.

We are very good at what we do. Maternal and perinatal morbidity and mortality are at incredible lows. So low in fact that public perception of pregnancy has changed to the point that many people feel they are entitled to and guaranteed a healthy child as soon as the pregnancy test is positive. I sincerely wish this were the case, I do, but sadly, it is not. Bad things still happen, people make mistakes and babies and mothers do sometimes die.

No one wants this and no one feels more responsible when this happens than those of us whose duty it is to prevent it from happening. We are not monsters or misogynists despite what some may think or imply. While you may blame us when things go wrong, the blame you are apportioning to us is nothing compared to the blame we are placing on ourselves.

Please do not misunderstand me, I do not wish to minimise anyone’s grief. A motherless child or a childless mother are 2 of the most deeply saddening and unacceptable concepts I can fathom. I am thankful I have no personal experience of either one.

If fingers need to be pointed, then point them you may but please do not forget that we are all people underneath it all. We are flawed and fallible but not malicious. And when we fail you in our duties we are just so so sorry for that.

10.12.14